Ian Thomson (1947-2015)

At 9:30pm Tuesday 21st April 2015 a dear relative of mine finally passed away. For the past few years the grim reaper had been trying to bash down his front door, but shim finally succeeded smashing through it and began hier work claiming him on Saturday. His final moments were in the care of the nurses in the care home in Meigle (I'm sure its the only one in that village. And I'm sure his spirit will have lingered for a while at the Sculptured Stone Museum, home of one of the finest collections of Pictish carvings in Europe. He would have liked that.).

Ian Thomson (or "Papa Oyibo", as he was called by the Yoruba people in Nigeria) was a senior engineer who's intellect and charm led him to have many adventures in Africa, Asia and the Middle East while at work there. He was a well-travelled man, exploiting his knowledge, skills of storytelling and Scottish charm all over the place. They are many, which I have trouble remembering in exact detail as they were so many. He did write them down in black book, which I have seen him read from (and I hope, is saved from obliteration (more on that later)).

Of all the stories I have heard, one story that I just got reminded of by my mother recently (which, I think, is very relevant now) is how he became "The Man Who Sang." One day in an Islamic country (I don't know which one exactly, but for the sake of the search-bots invisibly crawling over this text let's keep it vague shall we.), Ian sang out loudly from the roof of his hotel the song "The Lord is My Shepard" (I think, I'm not 100% on this (keeping it vague).). Non-surprisingly, he was soon arrested for it. However, while most people would just accept the punishment, Ian argued that he technically didn't break the law on the grounds that the the scripture in question can be found in the Koran, therefore singing it was not an act of blasphemy. He was free in a hour. That night, at one in the morning, he received an alarmed knock at his door. It was from a Christian. He had heard of the story of "The Man Who Sang" and asked him to become their minister (as their previous ministers kept been getting arrested). He turned down the offer been a minister (he was not that religious), but he did meet with the other Christians and taught them (basically) how they can get away with expressing their faith without going to jail by exploiting the fact that the Koran contains many scriptures that originate from the Bible. (It's a history thing not many people realize. DISCLAIMER - I am not a religious scholar, just a casual amateur historian.)

And that's just the tip of a huge iceberg...

By 2000 he had enough life experience and intellect to have talking match against Brian Blessed. I can confirm this as it was by this time that I actually started to know him. By then, he began to write down many stories fictional and biographical.

He did manage to get one story published as a children's book in 2000, which I have a copy of...

Big Brother, Little Sister by Papa Oyibo (2000)

I checked and its on sale on Amazon.

This is one many many short stories he has told and written over the years. However, he hasn't been able to publish them in the traditional money-making sense because...

1. His ill-health in his later years prevent him from almost all physical work.
2. Because of this ill-health he was highly dependant of welfare.
3. If he did try to make any money from publishing his work, he'll lose such welfare.

That is a horrible situation for anyone creative. And that is just the tip of an iceberg of bureaucratic nightmares he had faced in the final decade in his life due to his health and the fact he married an American and nearly routinely crossed the Atlantic. Love knows no boundaries.

But now that he is no longer with us, I am personally worried about the amounts of written material he has left behind (on paper and on digital media). What is going to happen to them? Is some heartless philistinal house clearer going to destroy this material? I would be absolutely angry if someone did this to my collection of drawings and writings. And if this did happen when I died, I will (if it is possible in the afterlife) haunt this guy's house as a poltergeist and  destroy everything he had worked hard to earn or assemble, making him feel what this angry spirit is feeling. I imagine Ian would feel the same way. And I would imagine he would have read what I have just said (though the ether of our Wi-Fi signals and on an iPad (as Steve Jobs has improved the infrastructure) and is thinking of doing just that, now that he has no sick physical body and the law to hold him back (as far as I know the law doesn't apply to ghosts). So if you hear news of a house clearer in Scotland (or anyone working in the DWP) experiencing destructive paranormal activity recently, its a good chance its my Uncle Ian.

To any of his and my family reading this, I can safely assume that Ian would be in fits of laughter reading that last bit. He needed it, after all that bureaucratic headaches he suffered in life.

But I still worry about his creative work. However, I know that a small bit of it is safe, because I have a few bits of it on my hard drive. A few years ago he proposed an idea to make a children's eBook, featuring illustrations by me. I did a few sketches for it, and he gave me a lot of material to work form, including the original text. However, things got in the way (mostly due to his health) and little progress was done. But, I still got all the material, and it should be enough that (if I have the will and time) finish this book (plus a few sequels, if its a success).

My uncle Ian was an inspiration, and I am very saddened that he is gone.

This picture was taken in 2010.

Later images don't do him justice due to his ill health.

Is This Probably The Best Beer Ad in the World?

Mock-up of Carlsberg Free Beer Dispensing Billboard (2015)

On 8th April 2015, near to the Old Truman Bewery in Shoreditch, London, Carlsberg (the beer that claims to be "probably the best beer in the world") set up what is probably the best beer poster in the world - a poster that gives out FREE BEER!

Yes, Carlsberg made a billborad that gives out free beer. 

I know. It sounds like something from the 20th century (maybe 1970s America?), but this has happened. A brewer has done a publicity campaign giving out free beer. Carlsberg must have a lot of balls, doing this in a time when the very idea sounds like (to a notable percentage of the population) the anti-smoking ad giving away free cigarettes I made last year. But, so far, I have heard no news of  large drunken riots in London.

Carlsberg do plan to roll this out across the UK. Is this a good idea? I don't know, considering the British's reputation when it comes to drink. I bet the usual people (The Salvation Army, the AA (and the other AA as well), etc) will protest this in the usual reactionary way, but I don't think it'll do anything. In fact (judging from the history books), it will make more people drink from the billboard.

So, people who are appalled by the idea who want to protest - don't protest. It'll make things worse! One of the lessons from history people repeatably fail to learn is that as soon as someone makes a fuzz about something (a book, a film, an ad campaign, etc) others will wonder why that person is making a fuzz and be curious enough to do the very thing you didn't want them to do!

Think of when many Romans became Christians when it was a persecuted cult in Rome.

Think of the many people in 1979 who travelled vast distances to see Monty Python's Life of Brian, because their council or country had banned that film, because the powers at be thought it was blasphemous.

And think of the many things that happened in recent years that have resulted from injunctions or someone trying to act their "right to be forgotten"....

The "Right to be Forgotten" discussion on Last Week Tonight (May 2014)

My call to not protest can apply to all forms of cultural protest. That's movies, books, video games with questionable content, or crazes that don't do physical harm (crazes that do should be protested against).

I know, my definition can sound ambiguous, like a tax law with an unintended loophole, but.... 

I think its better if I explain in another blog. 

But for now, I say it applies to questionable ad campaigns, like this one.

And maybe, it will become (probably) the best ad campaign ever - for not causing a drunken brawl.

Would that be great?