A Bar Scene from 1891

Written in 2016. First published in News and Views newsletter.

You are in an art gallery confronted by a painting. About A3-sized, the oil painting depicts a Parisian bar full of a dozen customers doing what they usually do in a bar in a style similar to Claude Monet and the like. Behind the bar is a honey-blonde woman serving the drinks with a perifereia of bottles behind her.

“This is one of the noted works of the lesser-known French artist Monet La Trencher – A Bar Scene from 1891. Part of the Neo-Impressionist movement, Trencher explored urban Paris…..”

“Rubbish!”

“Excuse me?”

“This is a fake.”

“And how would you know?”

“Because I am Monet La Trencher. Trencher never existed. I invented him.”

“Why?”

“Shut up, whoever you are. The gallery closes in ten minutes and I got a …"

“Good. Plenty of time for me to spot my deliberate flaws in this painting.”

“Deliberate flaws?”

“Of course. I put a few in to …”

“Just tell us, man.”

“Fine. Notice the youth drinking a coke.”

“Yes, the man holding the coke bottle.”

“That bottle shouldn’t exist in 1891.”

“But I thought coke was invented in the 1880s.”

“Yes, but that bottle wasn’t introduced until 1915.”

(Gasp all round.)

“And there’s more. Notice the bottle of Iron-Brew behind the bar maid. Didn’t exist until 1901. That sign in the background, the font I used is Century Roman, created in 1894.”

“Security!”

Two security guards arrive to drag “Trencher” away.

“The bar serves Strong Bow and Famous Grouse whiskey!”

“Sorry about that. Where were we?”

“He’s right, you know. According to my phone that coke bottle design was first introduced in 1915.”

“And that lass is wearing a fitness tracker.”

“that’s it. Tour’s over. Gallery is about to close everyone. Gift shop is on your right.”

Everyone leaves the gallery. 

The lights go out… 

and (thanks to some luminous dye) the words 

“actually painted in 2013 – Monet La Trencher” appear on the painting.

The Reading Penguin

Written in September 2017. First published in News and Views newsletter.

Imagine sometime in the future where space travel is as regular as air travel is today. Because of the distances involve they are space ferries in operation between the planets. As everyone knows, it takes forever to travel to Mars, so these ferries have facilities to make them as self-sufficient as possible and the trip comfortable. Things like automated farms, restaurants, a school, theatres, a library, a hospital and … a vet.

Yes, some passengers have bought their pets with them. On one of these vessels at any given time they are probably a dozen animals at these vet/kennel at any given time. A dozen animals, of all walks of life, including fish.

Now imagine that something happened to one of these vessels. Space can be dangerous, after all. What if an asteroid hit one of those vessels and killed everyone on-board …. Except the animals? (One got smuggled on board and was under quarantine, leading to the place been sealed off, saving their lives.)

So, here’s the question. With an endless supply of food, water and air, and no humans to guide them, how would they cope?

In an environment originally-built for humans, would these animals continue been “animals?” Could curiosity eventually allow them to work out how their life support systems work, and allow them to fix them if a fault occurs? Could that later go further, maybe allowing them to read our books? And if so, would they understand what they read? Would they learn from them? Would they use the knowledge we had recorded to build a new civilization? A society with laws and a culture like ours or something completely different? Something unique. Maybe they’ll create their own stories and literature. Maybe in some distant future, a descendent of a bird might be reading Penguin Island with hands that were once wings. Just a thought. 

The Time Car (2003)

With 2015 been the 30th anniversary of Back To The Future (and been the year Marty, Doc and Jennifer visited in Back to the Future Part II) Back to the Future was a huge feature in this year's cultural clout (along with that new Star Wars film... and Spectre... and the film adaptation of The Martian).

Even I managed to do something (on the McFly) on the very day we were supposed to all have hoverboards. (Those dangerous things you have been calling "hoverboards" aren't really hoverboards. They got wheels! I'm the few who never saw them as one!) And I did this drawing on the day as well during my Inktober challenge.

Drawing from Inktober challenge -

Featuring humanized Absol Indians.

With all this talk about Back to the Future (and Christmas coming up) I thought this is now a good time to show you all something (probably embarrassing) from my past .... 

The first ever piece of fiction I've ever written.

Originally called The Time Travellers (lame name, I know) The Time Car was a story based on Back to the Future starring characters from The Simpsons and Pokémon and some alternate version of me as Doc. (There is worse fan fiction out there). 

If you want to know how this "masterpiece" came to be and (what you really want to do after reading this) read the actual story, just click the link under this mandatory legal notice.....

For legal reasons I must say beforehand that anything featuring in this story that were created by others (e.g. Matt Groening, Satoshi Tajiri etc (I can't keep track of everything)) belong to their respected creators. Everything else (including how everything is combined here, as far as I know) is mine. I'll ever claim someone else's work as my own.

To Story

My Take on Backwards History (Part 3)

The world in 1950 is very different from the world for 50 years earlier. As knowledge of semiconductors is slowly eaten away by the microbe, computers have become so bulky that the 1970s saw the last “personal computers.” They were getting too big for personal use, limiting their use to companies and institutions. Mobile phones have ceased to exist as well, limiting the world’s telecommunications to cumbersome land-lines, which now relied more on cables in the ground instead of satellites. There is less plastic been used, thanks to successful eco-campaigns and diminishing fossil fuel reserves. The knowledge of jet engines is disappearing with the sight and sound of less jet planes in the sky. The people are noticing the change.

Politically, the world is different with Russia and the US in a “Cold War” between capitalism and militarized socialism. During this “Cold War” China (the one mighty economic power) rejected capitalism and followed the Russians. Much of East Asia followed suit, fed up with the fluctuating booms and busts of the 1990s. Afghanistan, during its liberation from Islamic Fundamentalism were invaded by the Russians in the 1980s. In Eastern Europe, east of Berlin, the Russians took over. Germany had become the cooking pot of potential war since 1989 and soon it will explode. In this climate, the populace took more interest in politics. In fact, the turn out of democratic elections and political rallies had increased during the “Cold War.”

One cause of the increased interest in current affairs was the collapse of television. With the microbe eating away the knowledge of technicians, the 1990s saw the transition from digital to analogue technology. This change dramatically reduced the number of TV channels, limiting to less than 10 to even people with satellite or cable. As knowledge of video recording decreased in the 20^th century, they were less repeats and more live programmes. By 1950, there was little to watch, with little recorded programmes from the past that could be played through telecine and further reduced number of channels (with some territories having just one channel), which were all now in monochrome. Programme makers were desperate, with TV schedules full of variety acts taken from the booming music halls and theatres. This forced more people away from their screens and doing other things for their leisure time, such as model building. As a result, the audiences were getting smaller and this had a knock-on effect in advertising. With decreasing funds from advertising, most commercial TV stations switched off. Only, government-backed stations remained until the technicians finally forgot how to operate the equipment. The 1920s would see the last TV broadcasts, done only by amateurs in the hope of reviving it in the future. 

The collapse of digital media (as well as television) was a mixed blessing for politics. Although its distracting powers had decreased, it was becoming easier for governments to control the media. As a result, there was a boom in propaganda worldwide from the 1960s onwards.

So everything was set for an explosion in conflict. They were smaller conflicts, such as Vietnam and Korea, but it was nothing compared what was about to start after 1950.

It began in China in 1949, when the population rebelled against their government after years of famine and cultural persecution. This lead to a Civil War in 1946. With China been an ally with Russia, the US decided to drop the world’s last nuclear weapons on China. But a calculation error (according to some sources) forced the bomber crew to drop their load on Japan instead. Japan had experienced a decreasing economy since the 1970s. By 1950, it was only the US needing supplies for the Korean War that kept them afloat. But when that war ended, Japan was a shadow of its former self and under the control by the Americans. The bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki drive the Japanese to banish the Americans and go to war with them. With Japan to deal with, the US was slightly detracted when; months later Germany erupted into a revolution to unite its two separated halves. A World War Had begun.

Meanwhile, during the “Cold War” the nations of Africa, South and Central America, who were caught up in the “war” decided to end their unstable mix of democratic and dictatorial governments with more stable rule from European nations. It wasn’t a smooth transition, with rebellions and coups and all that. But by the 1930s, most nations were under the rule of a small number of countries. Now their fate depended on these countries. 

My Take on Backwards History (Part 2)

When the mental clock of the human race began to tick backwards things were just as they were before the change. But, slowly behind the scenes, something was happening to the internet. Connections began to be lost more often, and the rate was increasing year upon year. It was becoming very annoying, more annoying than pop-up ads. Soon the problem got worse. People lost data, because they put all their fate on the cloud. IT engineers couldn't explain it, but a number of hackers found out the truth and tried to publish it online. But by then, the mid-2000s, the loss of data and connections was so frustrating in some places, people there stopped using the internet altogether. Slowly, the people of the world were removing their electronic umbilical cords of information reverting back to a pre-internet world. A few (mostly hackers and geeks) remain faithful to their main fix in life by 1983.

During that time, as cloud computing became impossible; computers became larger and thicker to include more internal storage function. With more space needed for larger hard drives a few sacrifices had to be made, such as built-in webcams. Mobile phones gave up been computers and became just… phones (with optional text messaging). The cause of the devolution of information technology was caused by the mass of data that was collected during the years the clocks run forward. As information technology “dumbed down” there was a mad rush to rescue that data before they became inaccessible. This resulted in a huge demand for physical media (CDs, floppies, tapes, etc). This was particularly true for large files, such as movies and music. With diminishing bandwidth, what was left of the interment was becoming a former shadow of itself, mostly made up of text, forums and low-resolution gif graphics. It seemed that the record and movie industry had finally licked piracy (they only now sell bootleg copies in market stalls or in pubs).

With one of their main sources of income gone organized crime and terrorism fell since the US began dismantling the internet. The Islamic fundamentalists could now only preach through official channels, such as radio, TV, print or (the most censor-free means) public gatherings. Unfortunately, after years of racial profiling because of their words (and actions) of hatred towards the West, the crowds they were getting wanted to beat them up. After a large attack on the US in 2001, the people of the muslin world decided that these who were tarnishing their religion’s reputation in the world must die. With help from the US and few other western powers, the people of the Middle East rooted out troublesome preachers of hate in a large violent war, which eventually ended with the establishing of a pro-western leader in Iran in 1979.

With no internet, it was now harder to sell products outside a person’s country, meaning a slump in global trade. Only large corporations could sell products across borders without trouble. This state of affairs (fuelled by angry former online retailers) causes a worldwide desire for countries to restrict foreign imports. Not only this gave foreign goods an air of wonder (due to their fewer number and price), it also boosted native manufacturing. People were buying more locally-made stuff. By 1967, for example, 97% of all cars in the US were natively built. Globalization was reversing. In 1955, as a symbol of the end of globalization, the last large container ship was scrapped.

Meanwhile (with diminishing trade outside their borders) China and America’s economies stalled and began to reverse, slowly decreasing. With industry requiring less and less power, China began demolishing a coal-fired power station every week. America did the same (but in a much slower rate). Wages began to decrease and the cost of goods increased. By 1970 a TV costs as much as a small car. The rising prices causes many people to return to repairing broken or worn out things instead of just throwing it away and buying a new thing. People were beginning to become more self-efficient and some turn to farming. But, to the many who were use to rising living standards (and wages) it was unthinkable situation. This causes massive riots and protests in all industrial nations. China witnesses a large one in 1989. The UK in 1984, 1979, and 1973.

In Russia, things got so bad during the 1990s that a more militaristic leadership was instated in 1991. With the call for invading Eastern Europe to stimulate economic growth, Russia built up a stockpile of weapons (mostly taken secondhand from unstable African nations). This move stimulate the US to stockpile weapons for a possible war against Russia. In 1989, the invasion happened… without bloodshed (except in Romania). The Americans (and other Western powers) stopped them in the middle of Germany. It was a stalemate. A stalemate that will last for 40 years, with each side working out how to break it. The solution both choose was nuclear weapons. If one can’t have the other no one can have it. During those 40 years, scientists worked on their nation’s nuclear program for better defense systems. But it was in these programs that people started to notice something happening to their brightest people… they were slowly losing their knowledge. With no microscope or imaging technology able to detect the microbe that was causing it, people couldn’t explain what was happening. But whatever it was, its effects were devastating. By 1950, humankind had lost the ability to manipulate genes, create human offspring outside the womb, build and fire rockets into space and how to solve a Rubik’s cube. What was going on? The very religious say it was God’s punishment for humans rebuilding the Tower of Babel, and their congregations accepted it.

With the loss of relatively recent knowledge, a lot of people die of now incurable problems and many secret initiatives by governments to encourage more breeding and to kill off the elderly to reduce the burden on pension systems, such as legalizing smoking in public places and introducing known hazardous substances in consumer products, such as lead-based paint pigments and mercury. By 1959, the human population collapsed from 7billion in 2011 to just 3billion. But, on the up side, there was less pollution and more housing and empty land available. And (with radical governments in the 1960s and 50s demolishing highways and airports, and investing more in railways and public transport) the world was a quieter place to live in. What could possibly happen next?

END OF PART 2

Part 3

My Take on Backwards History (Part 1)

And now, something I promised earlier – my take on backwards history (inspired by The History of the World Backwards).

How could history run backwards? Let’s begin with the 21^st century. The world is a high-tech heaven, with one-third of the world on-line and over a billion cars on the roads. People can travel anywhere on Earth in less than a day and have goods sent from there cheaper than somewhere local. Humans can manipulate nature right down to its genes and the material world right down to the atom. It seems a fabulous wonderland beyond the comprehension of any futurist before 1950.

But all was not well. Some of these technologies proved to be toxic to the Earth, especially in huge quantities. Heavy metals, non-biodegradable plastics, radioactive waste and over welling amounts of carbon dioxide were poisoning the life forms of Earth (including humans) and threaten to change the behavior of the planet’s climate. But the humans themselves couldn’t do all what was required to fix it, as they were distracted by squabblings over who is in charge and how they rule, who owns what bit of land or how much money, how should you lead your life and which celebrity has recently have a child. While the Earth’s biosphere was on the verge of breaking down, the most “intelligent” creature on it was almost doing nothing about it.

The Galactic Council decided to take action. As an experiment in planetary bio-warfare, the Master of Life commissioned the creation of a micro-organism that can invade the brains of intelligent creatures to feed on their thoughts, slowly reducing the host’s memories and mental capacities. When one was finally perfected to do so at a very slow experimental pace, a batch was brewed and bottled for an experimental release.

And so, on 17^th July 2019 some hikers in Yellowstone Park spot a UFO flying over them. They take photos and video of it on their smartphones and upload them online then they contact the nearest park ranger. Of course, the park ranger will be skeptical, like they just saw Bigfoot. Little did they know that what they just saw will affect them, their life and the lives of their future ancestors.

The spread of the microbe was slow, with its first hosts been visitors to Yellowstone Park. But with many visitors from across North America and some from the other continents, it soon got some global coverage by New Year. A year later virtually everyone was infected by the unnoticeable microbe and it began its work. One strange side effect was that the people of the world, after celebrating the transition from 2020 to 2021 (known as New Year) began to refer to the New Year as 2020 (the previous year). Humanity was thinking that their times and dates go in reverse, with the week going Sunday, Saturday, Friday and so on and the months going December, November, October and so on. Only anything numeral remained forward, such as the times of the day … except the numbering of the years. As 2020 (which was actually 2021) ended, humanity referred to the new year as 2019. Then the next year as 2018, and so on. With the microbe in their brains, no one noticed the change, like everyone always did this for all time. But its varying effects on individuals were beginning to bite and affect the course of humanity.

It began with two biggest things humanity on Earth faced – the damage they inflicted to the environment and the biggest conflict on Earth at the time, the War between Western secular societies and Religious fundamentalism (and some communism). This was mostly in the form of former highly Christian countries against fringe Islamic groups wanting their religion to be practiced right down to the letter as said in the Koran, but they were other religious groups that were in battle that were a smaller concern, such as Christens in America who think the bible is accurate to the letter and anything contradicting to it is wrong (such as the scientific proof the world was created by a Big Bang). While this was going on, communism (which had a battering a long while ago) was gaining some strength again through China’s growing economy and Communist hardliner North Korea requiring nuclear weapons. What the Islamic fundamentalists and China’s growing economy had in common was the internet. It was thanks to the boundary-less frontier of the internet that China was able trade globally (giving American capitalism a large virtual slap in the face in the process) and religious groups to spread anti-western and anti-science propaganda. It also allowed anonymous hackers to play havoc of computer-controlled systems and access secret information and spread it to the world, like under windscreen wiper flyers on a windy day. It was dangerous and consumed a lot of power (about 10% of the world’s electricity). China’s growing economy was fuelled a lot by coal, contributing a lot of the world’­s manmade CO­₂. Secretly (off paper) the United States made a decision that’ll truly begin the reversal of history. They couldn’t have considered it without the influence of the microbe, but they did - they secretly began to dismantle the internet. Backwards history had begun. 

END OF PART 1

Part 2